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Campus Visits: Highs and Lows

I just spent two lovely days on campus for my second and final campus visit of the semester. Here's what we accomplished each visit:

Visit 1

  • Lumbar punctures
  • Sterile technique
  • Clinical cases
  • Practice H&Ps
  • Focused H&P 1 with a standardized patient

    Visit 2
    • GU exams with a specialized teaching associate
    • Joint injections
    • Chest tube placement
    • Clinical year Q&A
    • Focused H&P 2 with a standardized patient
    • Suturing
    The GU exam was quite the experience. Our university brings in specialized teaching associates who are experts in either the male GU exam or female gynecologic exams. We discussed taking a proper sexual health history, teaching patients about condoms and proper usage, the correct language to use for these intimate discussions, and more. They also taught us proper technique for performing these exams... on their own bodies. 

    Don't get me wrong. I was very nervous about this and it was a bit awkward. But what better opportunity to learn about this than when the "patient" is also the expert and can give you excellent feedback on things like positioning, pressure, pace and more. I felt 100x more confident by the time we completed this four-hour long training session. 



    But then tack on a joint injection lab and chest tube lab, and by the time I got back to my hotel room to start reviewing for my H&P the next day, I was absolutely wiped out. I seriously could have fallen asleep no problem at 7:30pm. 

    My focused H&P the next day went... okay. It wasn't my most stellar performance, but I felt like I've made some improvements over the first one regarding my interviewing abilities and physical exam technique. But I felt flustered especially at the end when it came time to determine the treatment, and definitely chose the wrong medication. Yikes, yikes, yikes. 

    I was able to forget about this blunder pretty quickly, though, when I walked into our last lab of the visit -- suturing! A slew of pigs feet and suture kits lay before us, and I was instantly jazzed up and ready to tackle the next thing. 



    During this time, we had a chance to ask our clinical year coordinator any questions we had, and believe me, we all had plenty! We have about 18 days to fill out a preferences form (if we want to split any rotations, what specialties we like, where we have housing, etc), so that means it's getting closer!

    I got in the zone and really, really enjoyed giving suturing a try for the very first time. Granted, my vertical and horizontal mattress sutures could really use some work, but you gotta start somewhere! I left feeling excited about this hands-on skill and looking forward to more opportunities to practice.

    But that high didn't last long and was left feeling... heavy. 

    At first I thought it was the emotional exhaustion lingering from our GU activity. But then I realized it was a combination of things. Yes, the GU exam was a big deal. But that, combined with planning for our clinical year, plus feeling less than stellar about my focused H&P, I was left wondering... how in the world am I going to go from where I am now to ready for clinicals in just seven short months?!

    We have learned so much. When they say it's like drinking from a firehose, they are not lying. But now I find myself getting questions from my dietitian colleagues inquiring about random medical topics, and I'm saying, "well, I should know that!" Recalling what I've learned is such a difficult task. If you don't use it, you lose it, right? 

    I should be doing more. Studying more. Reading more. Reviewing more. Practicing more. 

    I'm feeling inadequate, tired, unintelligent, pressured, overwhelmed... did I mention tired? I genuinely want to be ready when clinicals come around. I don't want to make a fool of myself and more importantly, I want to show that I can care for my patients well. This educational process isn't just about passing classes and getting the degree. It's about coming out the other side competent enough to have peoples' lives in your hands. 

    I try to remind myself of how I felt as a dietetics student. I learned a lot in didactic but the rubber really hit the road when I finally got into my internship and could put that knowledge to use. Really solidify it with experiences. And practice. Lots and lots of practice. Maybe if I keep reminding myself of this, it'll help take some of this pressure off. 

    This stuff takes time and patience and practice and diligence and commitment. I can do that if I remember to be patient with myself, too. 

    Thanks for reading, 
    Olivia

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